girls which I left behind

... I'm a loner, and I have to admit it

... my life's path has been, and still is,
pretty rough

... for awhile, I lamented why I was never
given the chance to have a beautiful girl,
who truly loves me, my soulmate, if there
is such a thing

... but now that I look back on it, there
were some beautiful young girls, who threw
themselves at me, yet I repulsed them

... I was doing them a favor, because I don't
think there is a woman out there who can deal
with my mind, on day-2-day, intimate basis

... a few stand out out in my mind, and now
I sometimes feel sorry for being a disappointment
to them

... one, was once when I was on a horse powered
farm in Maine, a beautiful little redhead girl
was sent my way, but I refused, because
I was warned to watch out for redheads

... when working at an Italian restaurant
in the Virgin Islands, a beautiful tall blond
waitress caught my attention, and was actually
the muse for the first 20 or so, of my poems

... she actually walked right up to me one day,
in the kitchen backroom, wrapped her around me,
and said I'm receptive, what do you have in mind?

... I told her it would be a mistake, but I think of
her often, and wonder why I let that opportunity go

... but now I see. I am leaving this planet, my
karmic debt is soon paid off, and I don't intend to
incur anymore.

... now, I just hope she is happy with a good mate
somewhere, having a better life than with me.

... there were many others, women who I could have
had, but I didn't want bad enough to give up my
pursuit of heaven, or my concept of it.

... the Vedic texts, say that men can have wives,
babies, and a household, but once the child is
grown, it is understood that the man can go off
on his own, into the woods, to mediate on leaving

© 2014 by zentara
If it is the last word I write, let it be Vishnu